Love evident

We continue to stay with Don and hold his hand. He responds slightly to us so we know he still hears us. Family keeps coming in and out. Sister Betty is coming from Canada where she was vacationing....Sarah (David M.) is heading up from Indiana. Our house is brimming with love and pain. We are comforting each other. We snatch sleep as we can. It is so nice to see everyone concerned for everyone else. I am loving the comments on the Blog. I read them when I get the time so I am thinking of you and thanking you, too, for your love, prayers and concern. Don's heart and lungs are strong so are taking a while to get shut down. He continues to lengthen the time of breathlessness. He is resting easy. He knows that his family is around him because we get small traces of response. Thank you everyone for your love and prayers. Jehovah is getting bombarded. I can feel Him holding onto my hand. How can anyone get through such an ordeal like this without Jehovah, I wonder. And the hope he holds out is wonderful to think about for strength. To see Don again healthy and happy in Jehovah's new Paradise. TAKE THAT SATAN. YOU DID NOT WIN!!!!! Don and I are staying in Jehovah's love in spite of all Satan has thrown at us. I can't wait to cheer at his destruction.

Thanks again for leaving comments. They warm my heart. Don has touched so many lives. Barb

My Sweetie had a peaceful night but was unresponsive. He takes 7 or 8 deep breaths then holds his breath for about 40 seconds. Our children, Don,Jr, Ann and Teri spent the night along with mates and Papa's Sweetheart, Larissa. Someone was holding his hand most of the night. I guess you could say we were keeping a death vigil.

At least he is not in pain. Keep us in your prayers. Jehovah is certainly strengthening us.

barb

With Sadness

With sadness, I write to let everyone know that Don's battle is almost over. His breathing had been strange all day. Tonight he is experiencing longer periods of not breathing, easing into death. He is unresponsive but he is muttering in his sleep. I told him I loved him and kissed him and he weakly responded. He is still aware to a degree. The RN said it would probably be within 24 hours and quite possibly during the night time. I pray for strength. Barb

Sleepy Head

The little ones in the congregation used to call us Brother and Sister Baby...that is until they went to school and heard a little different sound. My sleepy baby had a good night's sleep as reported by his night nurse. He is still sleeping at 9:45 A.M.

I hold his hand and he seems know that I am there. He puckers up for me to kiss him. Does he pucker up for the nurses, I wonder?

His breathing is a little different today. He takes about 6 or 7 deep breaths then holds it for about ten seconds and then breaths normally for a little bit then repeats the cycle. Something new. The Doctor is visiting him today so I will get an updated assessment.

Thank you for keeping us in your thoughts and prayers. We have so many reasons to love Jehovah and our dear friends and family. Barb

Another Sleepy Day

I had made arrangements to go door to door with invitations to our upcoming District Convention in Toledo. Bob came over to visit with My Sweetie for the morning. While I was gone, he took Don outside on the patio to enjoy the fresh air and sunshine and flowers. He tolerated about 35 minutes in the wheelchair and then asked to go back to bed.

I am so thankful to Bob for being such a good friend. Don loves the be out with his flowers and his birds. The birds keep the yard insect free and the bees love the nectar of the flowers. It was such a refreshing day after that oppressive heat and storm.

He continues to weaken but his blood pressure is stable and his heart is beating strong. It takes a lot to get a good man down. I've known he was a good man for many years....dating back to when he first asked me to go out. He complied to my requirements regarding drinking and religion.

His pain is currently controlled although he continues to sleep quite a lot. Better sleep than pain. I plan on doing the Bible reading out loud this afternoon in preparation for the meeting. He is not eating today so far but he is not vomiting either.

Keep us in your prayers.

Barb

Teri (Tish) Heart

I just wanted to take this opportunity to once again thank all of you who have been bringing meals, fruit and sweets. I want you to know how much it truly means to our entire family. We are able to spend precious hours with Dad instead of in the kitchen.

Even though these are difficult times, knowing that all of you are praying for our entire family really helps me get thru the day....God is always with us, giving us strength to see the next day. Please leave a comment or word of encouragement, I personally love to end my day by reading all the kind words. Dad's days are limited....I realize that...but the love each and everyone of you are showing helps me to not only endure today, but to look toward the future when Dad is no longer in pain and I look forward to seeing him walking around and taking care of all the flowers on this earth. I thought he was a great produce manager...but I think he missed his calling.

God Bless each and every one of you...you are what Christians are called to be....God's hand extended and from the bottom of my heart....I THANK YOU!!

Tender Moments

Yes, I am building more tender moments with my Sweetheart. Most of the time he makes sense but last night he insisted he wanted two flowers. He emphatically lifted up two fingers and stared at me. It was dark outside but I turned the outside lights on and went and got a pink cosmos and a yellow cone flower. I came in and handed them to him. He looked at them and pointed toward a flower terrarium on his dresser and I figured he wanted me to add those to the flowers already there. I'm not sure what that was about but that satisfied him.

He was outside in his yard for fifteen minutes in the afternoon then he asked to be taken back in. His back hurts if he sits up too long. Son-in-law Dan took him out in his wheelchair. He looked around and asked to be moved several time. I guess to change the angle of viewing. For anyone who has not seen our backyard, it is all Don's design and most of his work. I am mainly the weeder and transplanter. He is getting ready for the Paradise by having a piece of it now in our backyard.

He slept well last night. The increase in his medication is working. His pain level is tolerable.

Hopefully, we will make more sweet memories today. Barb

Pain increases

During a restless night my honey's pain started to increase. He complained about severe pain across his back (kidneys) Of course it is because of the compromised kidneys. I contacted the nurse and she contacted the doctor who increased his methanol. The whole idea is to keep him pain free because the cancer is winning the battle. Because he was awake a lot during the night, he is quite sleepy today. Teri brought him a small chocolate Frosty which he asked for. He did eat some of it but nothing else so far. Ron Lardie was over and said a prayer with him. I know he appreciated that. They also talked about Uncle Al and Father Earl. Some good faithful men who now are resting awaiting a resurrection. Don wanted to go on trip today and wondered why I wouldn't let him. I told him he was too sick. He disagreed. I told him OK stand up and we will go. He tried and knew I was right. Thank you for checking on us. We love you all. Barb

Another Day

My sweetie slept well last night. I fixed my cereal at 8 and went by his bed and started to eat. He raised his hand and indicated to give him some. He ate about 4 spoonfuls of Honey Nut Cheerios and milk. Then he went back to sleep. I got to eat the rest. He asked me what took me so long to get down to him. I think he thinks he is still in the hospital. His room certainly looks like a hospital room. He reached over to me and I got up and he threw his arm around me and gave me a hug. He continues with very limited fluid output and sleeps most of the time. I'll try to consider the daily text with him later after he rests up. Thank you all who are checking this Blog. I LOVE your comments and expressions of love. They strengthen me. I know that all the prayers on our behalf are also. I am glad that Jehovah is going to rid humans of this curse and I love the idea of living forever on the earth. If I will no longer be married to Don, I will be deeply satisfied seeing him happy and healthy.

Family Day

Because son David was home with his family, the weekend was filled with hugs and tears. Don enjoyed seeing Connor and Drew. He held on the Dave and Donna a long time. His smile was very evident. He gave them each a long, long hug. He slept a lot today but there was always someone in the family holding his hand or sitting by him. He ate very little and drank very little and is getting weaker. His excretion (urine) is brown. He was kept pain free. Thank goodness for Hospice.

His favorite nurse, Marie, was back again this morning. Anne and Don brought over food and the 3 youngest grandchildren, Elana, Drew and Connor, put on some funny plays. I especially liked the peanut butter sandwich skit. The three of them played nonstop. It was a joy to see. It warmed my heart to see the children and grandchildren all interacting and loving on each other and Dad. Sister Betty spent the night last night by Don's side. He used to stay by her side when she was sick as a child so she is returning the love. All three sisters were over today loving on him. We know the inevitable outcome of the illness and are so thankful for the resurrection hope. We talked about it often at the beginning of this ordeal. Keep us in your prayers. Love Barb

Hard Day

My sweetie started to become delusional again. We know that his kidneys are shutting down. He is drinking little, eating little and sleeping a lot. I don't know how much time I yet have to hold his hand but I know that I will be with him as much as I can. It is a numbing feeling....hard to describe. The four children were over today. The boys mulched our yard. Each took time holding Dad's hand and talking with him. Keep us in your prayers. Barb

A Big Thank you from us, too.

We deeply appreciate the love that has been shown in our behalf from our daughter's friends. The food was generous and delicious but the love behind it was even better. You are following the golden rule. We very much are humbled by it. Take care of our Baby Girl in the months ahead. She will be facing one of the most difficult times in her life: to lose her father to death. We look forward to seeing him again in the Paradise. All our love, Mom Barbara

THANK YOU!!!

I just wanted to send out a HUGE thank you for all the teachers and coaches of the Stones Ministry @ Rock Community Church for all the meals this past week. You have no idea how much it has blessed our entire family. You are showing what it means to be God's hand extended!! Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I love all of you....Teri Brune

Sleepy day

Well, it surely was a sleepy day for my Honey. The visiting Karmanos nurse had assessed his medications and came to the conclusion that he probably was overmedicated. The goal is to diminish his pain while keeping him alert. He has been in la la land for the last day. His visitors bearly saw his eyes. Hoping he is more alert when son David comes tomorrow.

The Family

Yes, his sense of humor is intact. . . .

While visiting Dad tonight while he was eating dinner with Tish, Brian and Jessica, Tish noted that a Hospice aid was visiting tomorrow, perhaps to help Dad with his bath. Trying to pull his chain a bit, I asked him why all of his nurses wanted to give him a bath. He paused for about 15 seconds them whispered  "I think you had better ask everyone to leave the room."

Don Jr.

Another Day

I am thankful to Jehovah for every additional day I have with my Sweetheart. He slept well last night. His night nurse, Icelene, takes such sweet care of him. He hugs her goodbye in the morning.

A funny tidbit to share: I came up behind him this early morning and hugged him around the neck, leaning my head on his shoulder, and asked if he slept well last night. I kissed his neck and told him I loved him. He whispered that he loved me too. Then he quipped: Who is this? So his sense of humor is intact.

He sleeps a lot. His pain is under control. Pray to Jehovah to strengthen us. \

Love you all, Barb (or Mom or Gram)

The food is great

Thanks to everyone who has been bringing over food for Dad and Mom. Mom is making sure I am well fed on my visits. . .

PS - Uncle Ray's smoked pork loin was outstanding (if he is thinking about a retirement respite, I am sure we can get enough nominations for a guest spot on Top Chef). 

Don Jr. 

Mom's notes

I have been touched deeply by the love of my extended family....especially Don Jr. and Tish,  grandchildren Brian, David and Jessica, sisters Betty and Pat and brother-in-law Ray and .......

I was especially touched by the nice things that son Don said about his dad and the love that is being displayed between Tish and him and in our behalf. I am not minimizing what the other members of the family have done, but these two were outstanding in organizing, implementing and removing all road blocks for me.

His sister Betty and I went to the Clinton Grove Cemetery today and bought the lots and made the arrangements...a difficult thing to do for both of us. Betty has loved him much longer than I have.

Don is having a good day today. He ate the best breakfast he has been able to since he went in the hospital so his appetite is improving. He continues to weaken daily and needs assistance to do even simple things. He sleeps a lot. Our wonderful nurse, Marie, is tireless is helping me care for my best friend. It touches me deeply to know that Jehovah sees our pain and hurt and is daily conforting and strengthening us.

Don is having a good day today...he is resting comfortably and enjoying being with family.

Dad is home

Introduction to the Blog

Whether you call him Dad, Grandpa, Don or Brother Baty, we all agree on one thing, he is a very special person and someone who we all love very much. Because we all care so much about Dad and Mom, and want to be kept up to date on how Dad is doing, we created this Blog. We hope to also use this blog to share our our thoughts with Dad and his extended family and friends.

If you have questions about using the Blog, you can email David Baty (the grandson David, not to be confused with my brother Dave) at david@baty.be.

Telephone Calls

Dad's voice is weak so it is difficult for him to talk on the phone. Mom likes to hear from you and receive your encouragement and support, but she asks that you try to limit your non-essential calls to between 10:00 am and 4:00 pm. Also, please feel free to leave an message with the nurse or their answering machine so Mom can return your call when it is convenient.

Visitors

Dad and Mom love to have visitors, but unfortunately, there are times when they are not up to visitors and need a little peace and quiet. Pleaase try to call in advance if you want to visit.

An update on Dad's Condition

A blockage in the ureter running from his good kidney appears to be the culprit that caused Dad the confusion and restlessness he was experiencing. With his strong kidney not working, there was a build-up of poisons in his bloodstream that made his mind go into 'overdrive' (fortunately, Dad told me he remembers little of the week in the hospital). A stent was put in last Saturday and his kidney was functioning adequately by Friday morning and Dad came home on Friday afternoon, July 16.

Unfortunately, because of the kidney problem and his growing weakness, Dad will not qualify for experimental treatment at Karmanos. Because efforts to continue to fight the cancer will only make him feel worse, with Dad's prior concurrence we have started hospice. Our focus now will be on making sure Dad is comfortable and his pain controlled the best way we can. With nursing care around the clock and moving back home, Dad is in good spirits and getting great care and attention without overburdening Mom.

Dad continues to teach us

Yesterday, with the help of grandsons Brian Verbeke and David Baty, Brian's wife Jessica and my amazingly tireless sister Tish (Teri to everyone other than me), we got Dad moved into his room and Mom situated in the guest room. In the process we needed tools and other odds and ends. Of course, Dad knew where everything was, and his grandsons were amazed at the organization of his tools and garage. When we were finished, with a smile Dad gave David and Brian the admonishment he used to give me - "put them back where you found them" - referring to the tools they had used. (I think Dad also made sure to say it in my presence as he knows I sometimes forget the "lessons of my youth" when it comes to my own tools).

and inspire us. . .
When Dad got the news that his cancer was not curable, he told me that his only angst was that he would not be able to take care of Mom. I reassured him that he need not worry a bit about this and that we (his natural and his family of friends) would make sure that Mom is and will be taken care of. Although it saddened me to have to have such a discussion with my father and best friend, it was an inspiring example of selflessness and love for one's wife. Hopefully the support for Mom he has seen in the past several weeks from his children (and their spouses), sisters, grandchildren, nieces, nephews and spiritual family has been reassuring and comforting to Dad.

A thank you . . .

I want to thank everyone who helped Mom over the past several weeks - from taking Mom to the hospital for visits, cleaning up their back yard after the recent storm, making sure Dad and Mom had everything they needed when he got home from the hospital, running errands, to helping clean the house and bringing over meals - as this not only helped Mom but hopefully also demonstrated to Dad that his worries and concerns about Mom being taken care of are unfounded.

Don Jr.