Saturday, July 24, 2010
Hard Day
My sweetie started to become delusional again. We know that his kidneys are shutting down. He is drinking little, eating little and sleeping a lot. I don't know how much time I yet have to hold his hand but I know that I will be with him as much as I can. It is a numbing feeling....hard to describe. The four children were over today. The boys mulched our yard. Each took time holding Dad's hand and talking with him. Keep us in your prayers. Barb
Friday, July 23, 2010
A Big Thank you from us, too.
We deeply appreciate the love that has been shown in our behalf from our daughter's friends. The food was generous and delicious but the love behind it was even better. You are following the golden rule. We very much are humbled by it. Take care of our Baby Girl in the months ahead. She will be facing one of the most difficult times in her life: to lose her father to death. We look forward to seeing him again in the Paradise. All our love, Mom Barbara
THANK YOU!!!
I just wanted to send out a HUGE thank you for all the teachers and coaches of the Stones Ministry @ Rock Community Church for all the meals this past week. You have no idea how much it has blessed our entire family. You are showing what it means to be God's hand extended!! Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
I love all of you....Teri Brune
I love all of you....Teri Brune
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Sleepy day
Well, it surely was a sleepy day for my Honey. The visiting Karmanos nurse had assessed his medications and came to the conclusion that he probably was overmedicated. The goal is to diminish his pain while keeping him alert. He has been in la la land for the last day. His visitors bearly saw his eyes. Hoping he is more alert when son David comes tomorrow.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Yes, his sense of humor is intact. . . .
While visiting Dad tonight while he was eating dinner with Tish, Brian and Jessica, Tish noted that a Hospice aid was visiting tomorrow, perhaps to help Dad with his bath. Trying to pull his chain a bit, I asked him why all of his nurses wanted to give him a bath. He paused for about 15 seconds them whispered "I think you had better ask everyone to leave the room."
Don Jr.
Don Jr.
Another Day
I am thankful to Jehovah for every additional day I have with my Sweetheart. He slept well last night. His night nurse, Icelene, takes such sweet care of him. He hugs her goodbye in the morning.
A funny tidbit to share: I came up behind him this early morning and hugged him around the neck, leaning my head on his shoulder, and asked if he slept well last night. I kissed his neck and told him I loved him. He whispered that he loved me too. Then he quipped: Who is this? So his sense of humor is intact.
He sleeps a lot. His pain is under control. Pray to Jehovah to strengthen us. \
Love you all, Barb (or Mom or Gram)
A funny tidbit to share: I came up behind him this early morning and hugged him around the neck, leaning my head on his shoulder, and asked if he slept well last night. I kissed his neck and told him I loved him. He whispered that he loved me too. Then he quipped: Who is this? So his sense of humor is intact.
He sleeps a lot. His pain is under control. Pray to Jehovah to strengthen us. \
Love you all, Barb (or Mom or Gram)
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
The food is great
Thanks to everyone who has been bringing over food for Dad and Mom. Mom is making sure I am well fed on my visits. . .
PS - Uncle Ray's smoked pork loin was outstanding (if he is thinking about a retirement respite, I am sure we can get enough nominations for a guest spot on Top Chef).
Monday, July 19, 2010
Mom's notes
I have been touched deeply by the love of my extended family....especially Don Jr. and Tish, grandchildren Brian, David and Jessica, sisters Betty and Pat and brother-in-law Ray and .......
I was especially touched by the nice things that son Don said about his dad and the love that is being displayed between Tish and him and in our behalf. I am not minimizing what the other members of the family have done, but these two were outstanding in organizing, implementing and removing all road blocks for me.
His sister Betty and I went to the Clinton Grove Cemetery today and bought the lots and made the arrangements...a difficult thing to do for both of us. Betty has loved him much longer than I have.
Don is having a good day today. He ate the best breakfast he has been able to since he went in the hospital so his appetite is improving. He continues to weaken daily and needs assistance to do even simple things. He sleeps a lot. Our wonderful nurse, Marie, is tireless is helping me care for my best friend. It touches me deeply to know that Jehovah sees our pain and hurt and is daily conforting and strengthening us.
I was especially touched by the nice things that son Don said about his dad and the love that is being displayed between Tish and him and in our behalf. I am not minimizing what the other members of the family have done, but these two were outstanding in organizing, implementing and removing all road blocks for me.
His sister Betty and I went to the Clinton Grove Cemetery today and bought the lots and made the arrangements...a difficult thing to do for both of us. Betty has loved him much longer than I have.
Don is having a good day today. He ate the best breakfast he has been able to since he went in the hospital so his appetite is improving. He continues to weaken daily and needs assistance to do even simple things. He sleeps a lot. Our wonderful nurse, Marie, is tireless is helping me care for my best friend. It touches me deeply to know that Jehovah sees our pain and hurt and is daily conforting and strengthening us.
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Dad is home
Introduction to the Blog
Whether you call him Dad, Grandpa, Don or Brother Baty, we all agree on one thing, he is a very special person and someone who we all love very much. Because we all care so much about Dad and Mom, and want to be kept up to date on how Dad is doing, we created this Blog. We hope to also use this blog to share our our thoughts with Dad and his extended family and friends.
If you have questions about using the Blog, you can email David Baty (the grandson David, not to be confused with my brother Dave) at david@baty.be.
Telephone Calls
Dad's voice is weak so it is difficult for him to talk on the phone. Mom likes to hear from you and receive your encouragement and support, but she asks that you try to limit your non-essential calls to between 10:00 am and 4:00 pm. Also, please feel free to leave an message with the nurse or their answering machine so Mom can return your call when it is convenient.
Visitors
Dad and Mom love to have visitors, but unfortunately, there are times when they are not up to visitors and need a little peace and quiet. Pleaase try to call in advance if you want to visit.
An update on Dad's Condition
A blockage in the ureter running from his good kidney appears to be the culprit that caused Dad the confusion and restlessness he was experiencing. With his strong kidney not working, there was a build-up of poisons in his bloodstream that made his mind go into 'overdrive' (fortunately, Dad told me he remembers little of the week in the hospital). A stent was put in last Saturday and his kidney was functioning adequately by Friday morning and Dad came home on Friday afternoon, July 16.
Unfortunately, because of the kidney problem and his growing weakness, Dad will not qualify for experimental treatment at Karmanos. Because efforts to continue to fight the cancer will only make him feel worse, with Dad's prior concurrence we have started hospice. Our focus now will be on making sure Dad is comfortable and his pain controlled the best way we can. With nursing care around the clock and moving back home, Dad is in good spirits and getting great care and attention without overburdening Mom.
Dad continues to teach us
Yesterday, with the help of grandsons Brian Verbeke and David Baty, Brian's wife Jessica and my amazingly tireless sister Tish (Teri to everyone other than me), we got Dad moved into his room and Mom situated in the guest room. In the process we needed tools and other odds and ends. Of course, Dad knew where everything was, and his grandsons were amazed at the organization of his tools and garage. When we were finished, with a smile Dad gave David and Brian the admonishment he used to give me - "put them back where you found them" - referring to the tools they had used. (I think Dad also made sure to say it in my presence as he knows I sometimes forget the "lessons of my youth" when it comes to my own tools).
and inspire us. . .
When Dad got the news that his cancer was not curable, he told me that his only angst was that he would not be able to take care of Mom. I reassured him that he need not worry a bit about this and that we (his natural and his family of friends) would make sure that Mom is and will be taken care of. Although it saddened me to have to have such a discussion with my father and best friend, it was an inspiring example of selflessness and love for one's wife. Hopefully the support for Mom he has seen in the past several weeks from his children (and their spouses), sisters, grandchildren, nieces, nephews and spiritual family has been reassuring and comforting to Dad.
A thank you . . .
I want to thank everyone who helped Mom over the past several weeks - from taking Mom to the hospital for visits, cleaning up their back yard after the recent storm, making sure Dad and Mom had everything they needed when he got home from the hospital, running errands, to helping clean the house and bringing over meals - as this not only helped Mom but hopefully also demonstrated to Dad that his worries and concerns about Mom being taken care of are unfounded.
Don Jr.
Whether you call him Dad, Grandpa, Don or Brother Baty, we all agree on one thing, he is a very special person and someone who we all love very much. Because we all care so much about Dad and Mom, and want to be kept up to date on how Dad is doing, we created this Blog. We hope to also use this blog to share our our thoughts with Dad and his extended family and friends.
If you have questions about using the Blog, you can email David Baty (the grandson David, not to be confused with my brother Dave) at david@baty.be.
Telephone Calls
Dad's voice is weak so it is difficult for him to talk on the phone. Mom likes to hear from you and receive your encouragement and support, but she asks that you try to limit your non-essential calls to between 10:00 am and 4:00 pm. Also, please feel free to leave an message with the nurse or their answering machine so Mom can return your call when it is convenient.
Visitors
Dad and Mom love to have visitors, but unfortunately, there are times when they are not up to visitors and need a little peace and quiet. Pleaase try to call in advance if you want to visit.
An update on Dad's Condition
A blockage in the ureter running from his good kidney appears to be the culprit that caused Dad the confusion and restlessness he was experiencing. With his strong kidney not working, there was a build-up of poisons in his bloodstream that made his mind go into 'overdrive' (fortunately, Dad told me he remembers little of the week in the hospital). A stent was put in last Saturday and his kidney was functioning adequately by Friday morning and Dad came home on Friday afternoon, July 16.
Unfortunately, because of the kidney problem and his growing weakness, Dad will not qualify for experimental treatment at Karmanos. Because efforts to continue to fight the cancer will only make him feel worse, with Dad's prior concurrence we have started hospice. Our focus now will be on making sure Dad is comfortable and his pain controlled the best way we can. With nursing care around the clock and moving back home, Dad is in good spirits and getting great care and attention without overburdening Mom.
Dad continues to teach us
Yesterday, with the help of grandsons Brian Verbeke and David Baty, Brian's wife Jessica and my amazingly tireless sister Tish (Teri to everyone other than me), we got Dad moved into his room and Mom situated in the guest room. In the process we needed tools and other odds and ends. Of course, Dad knew where everything was, and his grandsons were amazed at the organization of his tools and garage. When we were finished, with a smile Dad gave David and Brian the admonishment he used to give me - "put them back where you found them" - referring to the tools they had used. (I think Dad also made sure to say it in my presence as he knows I sometimes forget the "lessons of my youth" when it comes to my own tools).
and inspire us. . .
When Dad got the news that his cancer was not curable, he told me that his only angst was that he would not be able to take care of Mom. I reassured him that he need not worry a bit about this and that we (his natural and his family of friends) would make sure that Mom is and will be taken care of. Although it saddened me to have to have such a discussion with my father and best friend, it was an inspiring example of selflessness and love for one's wife. Hopefully the support for Mom he has seen in the past several weeks from his children (and their spouses), sisters, grandchildren, nieces, nephews and spiritual family has been reassuring and comforting to Dad.
A thank you . . .
I want to thank everyone who helped Mom over the past several weeks - from taking Mom to the hospital for visits, cleaning up their back yard after the recent storm, making sure Dad and Mom had everything they needed when he got home from the hospital, running errands, to helping clean the house and bringing over meals - as this not only helped Mom but hopefully also demonstrated to Dad that his worries and concerns about Mom being taken care of are unfounded.
Don Jr.
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